allendalepharm Chapter 3381 Hot, hot, hot! My butt's burned!
Chapter 3381 Hot, hot, hot! My butt's burned!
Since that little pervert Guiya said he was coming to freeload a meal, she had to cook a table of "delicacies" that he couldn't find fault with.
However, the ingredients here are really... indescribable.
What was laid out on the cutting board was not green vegetables and radishes, but a pile of strangely shaped specialties from the ghost realm.
【Yinling Fruit】: It looks like a baby's fist, with a bluish-purple skin. When cut open, it oozes juice that looks like tears. It tastes sour and astringent, and it is said that eating it can cause nightmares.
【Styx Fish】: It has no eyes, its body is covered with barbs, and it jumps wildly on the cutting board even after it leaves the water, making a "squeaking" sound and spewing black gas from its mouth.
【Rotten Bone Mushroom】: A mushroom that grows in the crevices of corpses. It is pale in color and emits a faint smell of rotting flesh, but it is a rare source of "umami" in the ghost realm.
Yang Susu pressed down on the still screaming Styx fish with a blank expression, and slapped it with her bone knife.
"Snapped!"
The fish got dizzy, and the world became quiet.
She scaled and gutted the fish with fluid, effortless movements, as if she were handling an ordinary carp rather than a monster from hell.
"Master... is this thing really edible?"
Little Huang huddled in the corner of the stove, watching the bubbling black soup in the pot, and couldn't help but gag.
"It looks like poison brewed by a witch."
Yang Rui also hid behind the rice jar, only his eyes showing: "Su Shen, should we eat this fish too?"
Will eating this cause diarrhea?
Yang Susu: "Yes!"
Yang Rui: "..."
He quickly covered his mouth, absolutely refusing to eat!
Yang Susu threw the chopped rotten mushrooms into the pot and sprinkled in a seasoning that looked like bone ash.
Yang Susu: "This is called 'when in Rome, do as the Romans do'."
"Guiya is a hybrid of god and ghost, and his tastes are different from ordinary people. Although these things are disgusting, they contain extremely strong yin energy, which is very nourishing for him."
As the heat was increased, the broth in the pot gradually thickened.
The originally strange taste underwent a wonderful chemical reaction, turning into a meaty aroma.
Although it still smells a bit strange, at least it doesn't seem like a biological weapon anymore.
"Okay, it's done."
Yang Susu served the last dish, "Steamed Styx Fish".
At this moment, the huge white bone dining table was already filled with four dishes and a soup.
Braised Yinling Fruit, Steamed Styx Fish, Stir-fried Boiled Mushrooms, Cold Mixed Ghost Cry Grass, and a large bowl of purplish-black Tonic Soup for Ten Thousand Ghosts.
Its color is strange, and its aroma is irresistible.
Just then, a series of cheerful footsteps came from outside the hall.
"Da da da……"
Accompanying the footsteps was that signature, chilling child's voice.
"Mommy~ Baby's back! It smells so good, did you make something delicious?"
"Quick, hide!"
Yang Susu gave a low shout.
Yang Rui and Xiao Huang instantly darted behind the thickest pillar in the main hall like startled rabbits, huddled together, trembling and holding their breath.
The door was pushed open with a bang.
Guiya hopped and skipped in.
He was still covered in specks of gold dust—gold from the Ghost King's treasury.
It seems he had a great time in the vault that afternoon.
Wow, what a feast!
Gui Ya spotted the food on the table at a glance, and his deep blue eyes instantly lit up.
He jumped onto the chair without even washing his hands, grabbed a Yinling Fruit, and stuffed it into his mouth.
"Hahahahaha..."
Juice splashed everywhere.
"Delicious! Sweet and sour, much better than the pills in that fat pig daddy's treasure trove!"
Gui Ya ate with his mouth full of oil, looking completely satisfied.
Yang Susu stood to the side, handed him a clean handkerchief, and said in a calm tone, "Eat slowly, no one is going to take it from you."
Guiya took the handkerchief, wiped his mouth haphazardly, and suddenly stopped.
His eyes, which had been fixed on the food, suddenly shifted, scanning the corner of the hall like a radar.
That was the pillar where Yang Rui and Xiao Huang were hiding.
Gui Ya's lips slowly curled into a wicked smile, his eyes gleaming with excitement.
"Huh? Mommy, have two little mice gotten into the house?"
Why are you hiding there without making a sound?
"Would you... like to try the baby's dinner too?"
Behind the pillar, Yang Rui trembled.
Little Yellow's fur stood on end.
Finished!
It was discovered!
Before Guiya could finish speaking and before Yang Susu could stop him, he lightly flicked his sauce-covered finger in the air.
"Come out and have some fun, little mice."
An invisible ripple spread out instantly, piercing through the thick spinal column and striking Yang Rui and Xiao Huang, who were hiding behind it.
"Om-"
Yang Rui and Xiao Huang felt a blur before their eyes, and the scenery around them changed instantly.
The once quiet and luxurious Su Palace is gone, replaced by a raging inferno kitchen.
A gigantic cauldron of oil lay before them, the ghostly flames beneath it crackling and popping, the hot oil inside bubbling with golden bubbles, emitting wisps of smoke and making a terrifying sizzling sound.
Beside the oil cauldron stood a gigantic demon, hundreds of feet tall, with a blue face and fangs—an enlarged version of Guiya.
The giant Guiya held a pair of enormous chopsticks and was looking at them with a sinister grin.
"Hehe, extra treat tonight: deep-fried unicorn with braised local dog!"
"Do not--!!!"
Yang Rui let out a shrill scream.
He was horrified to discover that his body was flying up uncontrollably, plummeting straight towards the oil pan.
"Help! Junior Sister, help me..."
Little Yellow wasn't much better off. It felt like it had been thrown into a pile of flour and wrapped up in it, its whole body sticky, before its tail was pinched by those huge chopsticks.
"No! My meat doesn't taste good! I have rabies! Eating it will make you stupid!"
Little Huang kicked his legs desperately, tears and snot streaming down his face.
Immediately afterwards, that real burning sensation spread throughout my body.
"Fuck-"
They seemed to have really fallen into a pot of boiling oil.
The scalding hot oil coated my skin, causing excruciating pain as my flesh ripped apart and a terrifying sound as my bones crumbled.
"Ahhh... It's cooked! It's almost cooked, it's seven-tenths done!"
"Sprinkle some chili powder, no, ...don't sprinkle chili powder, I don't eat spicy food, waaaaah..."
in reality.
There were no oil cauldrons or giants in the main hall of Su Dian.
Only Yang Rui and Xiao Huang were jumping around in the main hall like two madmen.
Yang Rui clutched his buttocks, rolling around on the floor frantically, yelling, "Hot! Hot! Hot! My butt's burned!"
Little Huang frantically paddled at the air, yelling as it did so: "Don't flip it over, it's not cooked yet... Ugh, it's not cooked at all, help!"
They knocked over chairs, overturned vases, and even slammed their heads against the wall with a loud thud, but seemed oblivious to the pain, continuing their madness as they remained immersed in that terrifying hallucination.